He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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