we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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