Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize