im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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