go do what you do best...puke behind churches
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
