Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I think people are normalizing furries
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
