If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
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