Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
