I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
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