(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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