Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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