Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
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