I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize