i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
There r osticjed everywhere
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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