so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My legs feel like baby dolphins
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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