Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
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