i don't like sucking hair
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize