Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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