They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
