You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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