We're like a lot better than the average bears
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
