That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
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