im gay
i know
yea but for you.
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
