Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I'm sobbing to NWA
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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