Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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