Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
