no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
