We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
