im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
Randomize
