Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize