Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
