he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
