You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I FOUND THE LEGS
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Randomize
