Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
