Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Randomize