talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Do you have feelings for this penis?
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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