The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
The Olympian is in my bed
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
