if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
