I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Randomize
