i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Bring me that man meat
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
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