My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
