Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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