every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
should my penis look like a turkey
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
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