Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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