jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize