You're my little dorito
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
