we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
Randomize
