I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize