Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
