I think I am morally bankrupt
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
